Sounds from Home

Listening to "Ang Huling El Bimbo" by the Eraserheads

A BELATED Christmas gift arrived in the mail today. It's a CD of "Eraserheads Anthology". This morning when the snow has been falling continuously for five hours, listening to the CD brings me back to my little piece of paradise on Manigo Street where the air is balmy, the grass is abundant and where the branches of our neighbor's mango tree are always heavy with fruit.

The gift is from a very good friend of mine, Bhel Certeza, a young and adventurous, very creative and caring person. It's funny that I'm so eager to play this CD now. The Eraserhead's bassist, Buddy Zabala, and his girlfriend were my housemates once. The vocalist Ely Buendia, lived three apartments away. Back then we never played their music at home. Baduy kasi eh.

Pero ngayon...wow, repapips..dehins nako tobats todits!!!

One click on my iTunes and nasa Diliman na naman ako, kumakain ng fishballs at isaw, tumatambay sa Delaney hanggang 11 p.m., nangangamot ng puwet habang naglalakad sa Oval.

Salamat Bhel!

Understanding America: Where are the African-Americans?

FOR the average Pinoy, a lot of his perceptions about what the United States come from letters from Green Card-holding relatives, all those Hollywood movies, all the American magazines he has ever laid eyes on and all the MTV he's watched.

Before getting to visit the United States, I thought every city it had was 50% Black. I still held that belief after visiting the US three or four times. On hindsight, I realized that on these first few visits I only socialized with Pinoys--my family, my relatives and their friends. I didn't really pay attention to the number of Black people on the streets.

In 2002, I went a bike trip that started in San Francisco and ended in Washington D.C. That's when I saw that what they call Middle America is predominantly white and that Black people and other "minority" groups tend to live in the diverse and cosmopolitan cities on the West Coast and the East Coast.

That was when I also realized that there were no Blacks among the mostly-graduate-school-age group I was cycling with. It seemed that middle-class and upper middle class was a category seldom penetrated by Black students.

This was certainly very puzzling to me. You know, you grow up around relatives who keep saying that all you need to do in the US is to work hard and you will soon live a comfortable life and maybe even become rich. Ganon ka simple. Kung ganon ka simple, why aren't there more middle class Black people? Mahirap para sa isang Pinoy na maintindihan ito. All the opportunities are there.

My mom, who has always been pintasera, would say "katamaran lang iyan. "

AT the University of Minnesota Duluth where I study now, I see mostly white faces. Chubby white faces. A majority of my female choirmates are a size 18 and so many of them seem quite hung up on their own individual teenage issues and insecurities. Anyway, I digress. No one is my choir is Black. No one in my Outdoor Education Methods class is Black. Not one of this year's Wolf Ridge Naturalists Staff is Black.

Bakit? Di ba sa Sesame Street, may David at may Gordon. Meron ngang Luis at Mariah di ba? Ang puti lang doon ay si Mr. Hooper at si Bob.

Nakakalunkot at nakaka-disappoint to learn that racism is still alive and well in the United States. Black people are still hindered by institutions, like education. Public education is free. But a school's budget is derived from an area's real estate taxes. So if you are born in a very poor community, chances are, your grade school and high school will not be very good. Chances are, wala kang chance makapasok ng college because you might be dead by that time or in jail.

Noon, naiirita ako to hear about Black people's complaints about racism. Pero ngayon, I respect their opinions more. Hindi ito purely katamaran like my mother says.

Napakasarap pala na lumaki ako sa sarili kong bansa kung saan malaya akong mangarap at magplano. Kung saan walang nagsasabi sa akin na wala akong karapatang lumigaya.

Winter Blah

Today is the day that I hate? dislike? snow the most. I just can't go out for a walk because the sidewalks might be slippery. Also, the many decisions about what to wear to keep warm overwhelm me. I watched "Fargo" last night and it didn't help my winter blah.